Update on my 2 month post chemo doctors appointment

Dear Friends,

Thanks for your prayers, support, encouragment and e-mails. I am feeling stronger this week emotionally. Many circumstances are different but I do not wish my circumstances to dictate my emotions. They aren't actually much different, it is just that God is giving me more strength to handle them and yes the situations have eased up a bit. Feel a bit clearer in my mind (chemo brain) and being able to focus a bit more and handle more. I am getting things accomplished at work and outside of work and that makes me definitly feel like I am able to move forward step by step again and to start catching up on the months of lost time and have more emotional energy. Making more space and not so much having to concentrate on my health. I am being able to slowly introduce some of the foods I was staying away from. So many things I have gotten behind on around the house. I guess I have not really lost the time. I learned so much about my self this past year, grew in many ways, learned many new things, learned to relax (at least once in a while). Still feeling overwhelmed and having trouble focusing. I have to have patience with myself that I can not do as much as I used to. I have to lower my expectations. I am still very thankful that I have not spent a day in bed and do not come home from work and take a nap but am able to have a productive evening.

I met with my oncologist on Wednesday afternoon. All went very well. My blood tests all look great. My next check-up is in three months. I was asked if I have shortness of breath or pain to which I said no. My body feels quite strong. I am walking my two miles to work and two miles back again. Everyone was happy to see me and said I looked great. They were all wanting to see me without my wig. I walked around a bit with my wig in my hand because they were all wanting to see and were commenting on how great I looked without the wig and said that I could do either well. It is interesting how some can wear hats but not wigs. Some baseball caps look best. Some wigs look best. Some scarfs look best. I am a wig person. I will not leave the house without it. Now, I am more comfortable in the house with nothing but my own hair now that it is growing and does keep my head a bit warm. The last couple of days I have been putting on a baseball cap in the house. I think I will have to wait at least a month before going outside without the wig.

I brought some baked goods which were quickly eaten up by everyone around. Was nice to be able to share and say thank you for all their care for me. I ran into a woman, who I met for the first time when I was checking in for one of my chemo sessions. She commented on how much she liked my wig. Every time after that I ran into her even when my day or her day was different then our usual day. I was very surprised to see her yesterday. She was not there on her regular day and was very surprised to see me. She asked right away about my hair. By the way, she is a baseball cap person. She looks great in them. Got to share my experience with her and with the woman in the room next to her and to share the miracle that God has done in my life. A real sense of community. Can't believe that I am done and have anything to say to someone going through chemo. A year ago, I would have had no idea that I would be on this journey. But God has a purpose in everything. We suffer and in turn we are prepared to help those who are on the same path that we never would have been able to come along side to encourage.

I hope this makes sense. For some reason I can't get my thoughts to flow and they are hard to express.

I am thankul that God has given me peace this evening and is helping me to persevere.

I have many things that are important to do but I need to ask God for what His priorities are because I can't do everything and I should't put too much stress on me.

Blessings and wishing you all a blessed holiday season.

Ruth