Tips to Avoid Burnout

Accept Responsibility

We must never relinquish control of our schedules to the unpredictable and sometimes ruthless whims of the world or the demands of others. We should be active in self-examination. Nobody is locked in to anything. Each of us can accomplish the needed changes if we want them badly enough.

Acknowledge Limits

We can schedule our days more sanely, more humanly, and more relationally. We need not apologize for wanting a good night’s sleep; we need not believe the lie that “well-rested” is a synonym for sluggardly.”

Understand God’s Will

God never guides us into an intolerable scramble of over worked feverishness. We will gain more time by properly understanding God’s will for us than by all the time-saving suggestions put together.

Consciously Slow The Pace Of Life

The pace of life has become deadly. We simply cannot permit each year to bring an increase in speed and not get caught in the exhausting consequences of such a frenzy.

Define and Defend Boundaries

Jesus did not minister to everybody in Israel, even though He could have. Remember that it is not necessary to have more compassion than the almighty.

Learn To Say NO

It is easy to say no to a root canal or a colonoscopy. It is far more difficult to say no to things that are interesting or enjoyable. Yet even if everything we are doing is enjoyable, if we do not learn to say no, overload will overwhelm us.

Get Less Done, But Do The Right Things

We would do well to consider doing less, but radically prioritizing. Remember, the multiplying coefficient for our labor is the power of the Holy Spirit. The same God who spoke the universe into existence sees our faithful efforts and instructs the Holy Spirit to expand the benefit to whatever level best glorifies Him.

The following is taken from “The Soul Care Bible: Overcoming Burnout, H. B. London (Isaiah 40:31) with some inserts and comments from me.

Overcoming Burnout

Check out www.ruths-journey.blogspot.com for new entries (finally got some pics up there).

Dear Friends,
January 1st: I read something this morning in my time with God that really touched my heart and gave me courage to persevere with the changes in my life. For me it took an illness. My hope and prayer is that it will not take that for you to make changes to overcome burnout. I am sure most of you can totally identify with what I am about to share. I have been trying to make changes but feel a bit strange because it seems counter cultural and is also producing a bit of stress on those who see a different Ruth (being more honest and direct about my feelings). I am sure it is that we are all feeling the same stresses but don’t know how to get off the rollercoaster. Jesus took rest from the crowds. For me this is a really rich time of taking the time to really get to know the real me and my Lord in a real way. We don’t learn to REALLY trust until we are challenged and need to let go and let God take control. He shows His power in weakness. It is Him doing the work and not us. There is no doubt. I feel like every step takes every emotional energy that I have. I feel emotionally (not physically) very tired but so many wonderful blessings are coming my way unexpectedly with out me lifting my finger. Thank you Lord. I don’t take sleeping for granted. Not sleeping extra. Finally, sleeping (although not all the time). I am not the one used to being given the Love Offering from the church (what an unexpected blessing from a struggling congregation and from people who I know have much less then I have but gave from their hearts out of love for me), and the women’s group of another church putting together a lovely basket of things they contributed to my wellness. Did you know that there are socks that have aloe in them and moisturize your feet while you were them and they are also keep your feet very cozy. The Lord is really blessing and providing encouragement exactly when I feel like giving up. He says persevere.

I’d like to share with you what I read January 1st which impacted me and is something great to keep in mind and put into practice as the new year starts. There are some great tips the second part of this e-mail. People everywhere are feeling burned out and exhausted and those of us with physical and emotional weakness are feeling even more burned out. In this time of healing from the impact of this past year I am having to be more careful as to how I live life and setting of priorities. I am learning where to say no in order to minimize the stress that is not necessary. I am living a very full life, but with much more quality and the opportunity to recharge here and there. The following is taken from “The Soul Care Bible: Overcoming Burnout, H. B. London (Isaiah 40:31) with some inserts and comments from me:


Will a human being ever swim across the ocean?” Run a one minute mile? Go six months with out sleeping? Of course not, because of the established fact of human limits. Yet because of the rapidly changing conditions of modern living-largely due to progress always giving us more and more of everything faster and faster- we are attempting to exceed our limits in scores of areas all at the same time. The pain is palpable. People everywhere are collapsing in exhaustion wondering what hit them. What hit them was overload. This can be defined as the point at which are limits are exceeded.

Stress is such an accepted part of our modern culture that most of us accept it as normal. In reality, stress distorts our physical, mental, and emotional health, and affects our attitudes, marriages, work, and even ministry. We can overload ourselves to the point that we burn out and are no longer effective in God’s work.

Maximizing everything has, of course, become the American way. We push the limits as far as possible. We spend more than we have- whether it be money, time, or energy. Jesus, however, never seemed to be in a hurry. There is no indication that he worked 24 hour days. He went to sleep each night without having healed every disease in Israel. He followed God’s agenda, and so He was perfectly effective.

Jesus understood what it means to be human-and what it means to have limits. Jesus knew what it meant to prioritize and balance in light of these limits and how to focus on the truly important (Ruth’s insert: SO TRUE ON THIS JOURNEY. The focus is on getting well and doing the basics of Doctor’s appointments, work, laundry, bills, cleaning, eating well, exercise-my 2miles to work walk and 2 miles back. Thankfully there is time for relaxing with friends, and some e-mails and phone calls-hard to keep up on. I am learning to say no. Trying to lessen the load on my plate where possible and live on the essentials. I am cleaning out the clutter of my life in every aspect. I can’t put anything more on the plate until I take some things away.)

How do we know when we have reached our limits? If a car overheats, an indicator light goes on alerting us to the danger. Unfortunately, we don’t have such a visible system in most cases. Therefore, we have to be more honest with ourselves about our limits. (Ruth’s Insert: My limits are different then they were before. It also leaves more room for last minute opportunities should I be able to.)

From the beginning, rest has had a special significance for God (Genesis 2:3). This rest is not always easy, however. Even Moses had difficulty obeying the call to rest. He experienced unrelieved stress trying to keep two million Israelites happy as they wandered in the wilderness. God called Moses to rest and to delegate some responsibilities. Soon others helped carry Moses’ burden and his stress became more manageable (Num 11:11-17).

God’s calling in our lives does not eliminate stress and burnout automatically. No where does the Bible promise to ease all the stress in our lives. It does promise God’s peace when we allow Him to control our lives and shape our decisions. He gives us practical ways to limit stress and avoid burnout in the framework of His design for our lives.

(Ruth’s insert: Here are some practical tips. As I read them I realized that God has already been teaching me these tips and I have been implementing them in my life. It was nice to see some confirmation to continue and persevere.)

Accept Responsibility

We must never relinquish control of our schedules to the unpredictable and sometimes ruthless whims of the world or the demands of others. We should be active in self-examination. Nobody is locked in to anything. Each of us can accomplish the needed changes if we want them badly enough.

Acknowledge Limits

We can schedule our days more sanely, more humanly, and more relationally. We need not apologize for wanting a good night’s sleep; we need not believe the lie that “well-rested” is a synonym for sluggardly.”

Understand God’s Will

God never guides us into an intolerable scramble of over worked feverishness. We will gain more time by properly understanding God’s will for us than by all the time-saving suggestions put together.

Consciously Slow The Pace Of Life

The pace of life has become deadly. We simply cannot permit each year to bring an increase in speed and not get caught in the exhausting consequences of such a frenzy.

Define and Defend Boundaries

Jesus did not minister to everybody in Israel, even though He could have. Remember that it is not necessary to have more compassion than the almighty.

Learn To Say NO

It is easy to say no to a root canal or a colonoscopy. It is far more difficult to say no to things that are interesting or enjoyable. Yet even if everything we are doing is enjoyable, if we do not learn to say no, overload will overwhelm us.

Get Less Done, But Do The Right Things

We would do well to consider doing less, but radically prioritizing. Remember, the multiplying coefficient for our labor is the power of the Holy Spirit. The same God who spoke the universe into existence sees our faithful efforts and instructs the Holy Spirit to expand the benefit to whatever level best glorifies Him.

May you be encouraged this new year and take measures to stop burnout before it gets you.

For His Glory,

Ruth

The Lebed Method-Exercise Program

"Focus on Healing: The Lebed Method" (http://www.lebedmethod.com/) is a registered trademark and the Lebed Method is a licensed procedure. The Lebed Method program has been offered at many different places across the country for over 20 years. Many patients have reported it to be very helpful. It is important to note, however, that while there is research indicating that The Lebed Method has been useful to some patients the evidence is sparse and not conclusive.
The Lebed Method, Focus on Healing through Movement and Dance, is a therapeutic exercise program for women who have had any kind of breast surgery, node dissection, radiation, chemotherapy, Lymphedema, or who suffer with chronic fatigue. Two physicians and a dance movement specialist created this program to help women:

Regain Range of Motion
Increase flexibility in Frozen Shoulder
Work with Balance issues both physically and emotionally
Help reduce swelling from Lymphedema
May help reduce the risk of Lymphedema
Decrease depression
Add to sexuality
Increase femininity
Promotion of positive self image and joy
Weight stabilization
is FUN and EASY to do
No special physical abilities required

Fun and easy to do.

Certain exercises can be one of the major preventatives for some future problems for survivors, from one day after surgery to 30 years after surgery. This quality program is needed to help Breast Cancer Survivors thrive once they have survived, with a better quality of life.

Feeling Better-Day by Day

www.ruths-journey.blogspot.com


Dear Friends,

I am thankful for a relaxing, quite weekend. It helps to clear my mind.

Thanks so much for your support, prayers and e-mail this week in response to my SOS for prayer. I am thankful for those I found out who were led to pray for me that day specifically and didn't even know the extreme need I had. I felt a breakthrough on Tuesday afternoon. Started seeing many things moving forward. I am bit by bit taking care of things that have been on hold and God is the one directing for those things to finally happen. Finally being able to foxus on some things other then my getting better. However, I look at it as God's timing. As some of these things get out of the way I start feeling much less overwhelmed. Sometimes they are really little things but they have been on my mind for a long time. I see God taking care of me and reminding me that He is the manager of my life as He promised. I just need to go when he says go.

One of the exciting things that happened on Tuesday was taking the step of getting into an excercise class.
I was working remotely from home since I was not feeling that great (probably was fighting something and my body fights it the way it fought the chemo treatments instead of the way others bodies are fighting it-so many people were really sick at work and thankfully I did not really get it) and I saw in my Partners e-mail the Dana Farber Cancer Institute Online Announcements that I receive. I usually don't get a chance to even take a quick peek but I did this day and my eyes fell upon this class for Breast Cancer patients/survivors. So began a series of e-mails, and doctor's approvals etc. to get me registered.

I attended my first class on Thursday from 5:30 to 6:30. It is a six week course. First time taught in the NorthEast and it is a lot of fun and free (they received a grant to conduct this class). It was a small class with around 10 people. The class limit is 20 people and I feel so blessed that I saw the ad the day I did and took action.

On the next entry you will find more information about the dance, movement, exercise class method. We blew bubbles at the beginning of the class. I guess I was finally ready to be with others who are on the same journey. Helpful to hear about others experiences with the struggle of getting through the healing of the chemo brain. One woman said she is just starting being able to focus enough to read a book. I am thankful that I have been able to focus quite a bit. It is needed for my job so sometimes it is more difficult for me to focus on things outside of work and they take lots of concentration and energy.

"Focus on Healing: The Lebed Method" (www.lebedmethod.com) is a registered trademark and the Lebed Method is a licensed procedure.

Thanks for praying and thanks for your support

For His Glory,

Ruth

Fashion Show (#3)-New Clothes- New Size

Fashion Show #2

Fashion Show of New Clothes(#1)-With and Without Wig-December

Shopping Spree Demanded

I was forced to go clothes shopping in December when I could no longer put up with my skirts starting to fall down and I looked like a bag in my clothes because they were now so big on me. Had been for a long time. But enough is enough. I went down many dress sizes. Interestingly enough my weight stayed exactly the same from February until now. I think I have just redistributed it. One of the benefits of the journey I have been. Here are some pictures with and with out the wig. Some not so serious shots and some more serious. Thanks to my very young photographer, Danny. He and his family were visiting me and we decided to do a photo shoot and Danny ended up being quite a good shooter. We all had lots of fun.

Perspective is Everything

Dear Friends,

The last couple of days have been a bit of a struggle (after a blessed weekend). Many at work have been sick the lst weeks and maybe I am fighting something. Thankfully, it looks like my immune system has been working great. Been exposed very closely over and over again but I have stayed well. Yesterday my muscles and bones hurt, I had no motivation or desire to eat-acidic stomach (probably too much fruits-smoothies- and tomato based dishes). Plain pasta, cereal, homemade ginger tea were what I wanted. I made a nice dinner but then hardly ate it (even the plain rice). Feeling also tired although I was fairly productive at home yesterday. The weather could also be playing a role. Today I am working home remotely because I am still not feeling energetic. Just talked to someone who has a friend who was talking about her effects of the chemo brain. She in fact is lacking the enzyme to break down the chemo in her body. Now that they found that out she is on the mend. Didn't even know such a thing existed. Always learning something new. I must say that every day I am feeling better. I have been working and doing other things and most of the time forgetting what I have just been through. Maybe that is the problem. I might have overdone it and now my body is reminding me. Well, there have been so few days like this and even during chemo so I have so much to thank God for. No reason to complain but to ask you to pray with me for strength right now and continued healing. They say 6-12 months. I and those around me are having trouble being patient. It has been long enough but on the other hand mine is very short compared to many going through chemo. I am aleady feeling a bit better this afternoon. I am thankful for my friend down in El Salvador and his church who are fasting and praying for me today. Talked with him last night. They had already planned to fast and pray for me today before knowing that the last couple of days have been a bit of a struggle. Thankfully, I am still functioning but it just takes more to keep going. Constant reminder that God is the one who gives me the strength and it is a gift. I share with you below something on "Perspective is Everything". Pray it is an encourgement to you as it was for me when shared by a friend of mine recently. This is especially important as the drugs and the way my mind and emotions are these days my perspective gets easily turned around as well as what I hear and I think the worst and I am more sensitive.

For His Glory,

Ruth

Perspective is Everything

One day a father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the firm purpose of showing his son how poor people live. They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family. On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, "How was the trip?" "It was great, Dad." "Did you see how poor people live?" the father asked. "Oh yeah," said the son. "So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?" asked the father. The son answered: "I saw that we have one dog and they had four. We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end. We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night. Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon. We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight. We have servants who serve us, but they serve others. We buy our food, but they grow theirs.We have wallsaround our property to protect us, they have friends to protect them." The boy's father was speechless. Then his son added, "Thanks, Dad, for showing me how poor we are." Isn't perspective a wonderful thing? Makes you wonder what would happen if we all gave thanks for everything we have, instead of worrying about what we don't have. Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends!

Decision: Silicone vs. Saline

AT THE END OF THIS YOU WILL FIND A WAY TO HELP ME AT THIS POINT OF MY JOURNEY

Dear Friends,

I am learning more and more each day about this journey. It is a longer road than I thought and there are delays and detours along the path. I heard a message the other day that said: "If we don't get our hopes up then we won't be disappointed." I remember when I asked my plastic surgeon how much time it would take for the reconstruction process. He responded with, "You have a long road ahead of you." Not the words I wanted to hear. So I started moving the process along as quickly as possible by going once a week (the doctor told my I could come as often as once a week) for the expander to receive saline injections. But God had a different plan which I have had to learn to accept. I am in the process of learning to be less frustrated in life about things that are not in my way or in my timing, as I try to remember that God's ways are perfect and His timing is perfect. There is a reason for everything. So, the process of breast reconstruction is timed by God. He knows my body and how fast the skin can stretch, He knows how fast my body can adjust, He knows how much time is needed for Him to reveal which route to take-Silicone or Saline implant, He knows what is going to be happening in my life the next months and when will be the most convenient time for the operation, He knows when my body will be ready emotionally and physically for the implant. So I wait on Him.

It is surely timed by God. I thought that I would have the saline fillings as close together as possible to speed up the process by going once a week because I wanted to get this process done and over and also get the other two operations out of the way as soon as possible to be able to move on (I think I, as well as those around me were not aware of the process ahead or I forgot the information in the information overload phase earlier on). However, with my doctor’s schedule and mine it became every other week. OK I thought, that will just delay it a bit and I can have the operation in February or March. That was my idea. But God had another idea. This was God managing the scheduling since my skin was no longer able to stretch that quickly and I was starting to wonder ( am a bit anxious about going again for more fluid) how any more fluid could fit in the expander any way. In fact a few weeks ago I had to have him hold back from putting the whole amount in. This past week he was able to put the whole amount in, but I got the news that I would have to wait a month more for more saline because my skin needed more time to stretch (was starting to look shiny). OK, I get it loud and clear, God is in control and not me!!!! So, once the expander is filled well beyond the final size then there will be an operation to put in the “permanent” implant. They go into the same incision from before which have healed beautifully by the team of my great Physician (God) and my plastic surgeon. After that they will surgically create the nipple.

Well, God is surgically working on my body both outside and inside. Lot’s of pain (not physically) but the results are going to be great both outside and inside, that I am sure, because He who began a work in my will bring it to completion. That is a promise from God’s Word. I am growing by leaps and bounds feeling like there is not more that can go into my expander but there was amazingly more room and no discomfort this time. I keep on wanting God to stop from the chiseling away of my insides because of the pain but I know that he is getting rid of the impurities and getting me ready for the next steps of my life. In my weakness HE is made strong. He is teaching me life lessons. Learning to praise God even in the valleys of our life and seeing His blessings.
Now, here is the way in which you might be able to support and help me at this stage of the journey. I am in the midst of making the decision to go for a Saline or Silicone implant. Until recently there would not have been a decision to make, but Silicone is back on the market. My Doctor is comfortable with both and does not have a preference at this point. Many other countries have only been using Silicone for years. I have been told a few things regarding both options which I will wait to tell you.
My request is that if you have time and enjoy researching here is an opportunity to assist me in searching for information regarding the two options. I have been referred to www.mentorcorp.com. This might be a start. Would be great for help summarizing the information. I am in information overload and one of my strengths is not pulling information together even when I have less trouble focusing and do not have the patience for the web. My best way of learning is through experience but I do need tangible information as part of this decision making process. Another way to help is to gather information from friend’s of yours who have already been through this process to get their feedback on the pros and cons. Thanking you in advance for what ever information you can find for me. With many of you in the medical community and with Breast Cancer being so common these days I am sure there is a wealth of experience we can glean from. I will share the information later on the blog so it can assist others in the future.

Thanks,

Ruth

www.ruths-journey.blogspot.com New pictures coming soon

Happy New Year

Dear Friends, Happy New Year! Feliz Año Nuevo! Frohes Neu Jahr! Well, it is January 1st and almost a year on this journey. A year that I would not like to repeat and yet it was so rich and full of blessings that I would not want to have passed it by. I look forward to the new year and what God has for me this year. God uses those tough times in our life to grow us more like Him. A year of many changes and some very difficult life challenges. God promised that he would be glorified and that He has. He is faithful to His promises. I thank Him: -For His faithfulness ("I will never leave thee nor forsake thee") -For His love and blessings (we really learn to see that in the valleys of our lives which help us to persevere and keep the hope. I was reminded today that our hearts are either softened during the storms in our lives and we get to know our Lord more or our hearts are hardened and we turn away. I pray that my heart continues to be softened.) -For all the things I am learning about myself and others through this journey. Lessons that are life changing. I am a new person and I am still trying to understand how I fit in to God's plan for my new life. -That I am cancer free -That He was faithful in being my manager of my health as He told me He would and is continuing to be-For a skilled surgeon and plastic surgeon -For those in the medical profession at my health center and hospital administering my treatments -For those who gave me my shots -For Family -For Friends -For being carried through chemo and not looking or feeling much like a chemo patient -For minimul side effects (not one day or part of a day in bed, only three days of a stomach that didn't feel great in fact I most always had a huge appetite, no GI problems, no mouth sores, no pain) -A great wig -My hair growing back quickly (eye brows and lashes were not gone for long) -Support from family and friends emotionally, physically, spiritually, etc. -A supportive work environment -A fruitful Bible Study group at my house -Learning to relax and not feel guilty -For e-mails and phone calls from around the world with words of love and encouragement -Those new people I have met on this journey and been able to talk to and minister too as a result of this journey. I had a real problem with sickness and hospitals but thanks to working in the medical environment, going through Leukemia with a very special little friend of mine a few years back, my Dad's health issues, and finally my own struggle with Breast Cancer I am able to talk about things I never ever imagined I would be able to talk about and share about my experiences. THESE ARE JUST A HANDFUL OF THE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR. The last months have not been easy. It has been an emotional rollercoaster. It takes so much to hold in the emotions. Sometimes I am more quiet because it takes all my strength to stay strong and keep going. I feel emotionally tired and drained. Sometimes the tears just come unexpectedly or I say things that are not the way I mean to say them. I am thinking one thing and something totally different comes out. I have moments when I am real sensitive. I feel overwhelmed with what is important. Have trouble when things are asked of me or I feel are being asked of me and I have nothing more to give so I starting pushing the person or thing away to protect me. No room left in me for another thing. But I don’t always know what is happening and don’t know I am overloaded (I look fine and think I am fine) until I react. I can’t do everything at once and need to have patience to go step by step. Having to try to focus on one thing at a time and taking time out to not think about what needs to be done but to do something fun and relaxing. With work being crazy (feel like I am constantly getting more into a hole instead of moving forward except for this past week). I many times am ready for a change of pace when I come home and don’t want the same feeling of lack of moving forward with things that have to get down outside of work. However, I am staring to be able to focus on some new things such as organizing the pictures I have down loaded from my digital camera. I got the camera just as I got diagnosed and never had a chance to do more then learn how to down load them which I was doing so I could share them on the blog.

Well, I started this in the morning as well as some other entries that I will share with you all throughout the week and put them on the blog including some pictures. www.ruths-journey.blogspot.com.

Wishing you all a very Happy New Year.

Ruth